Brian's Blurbs: Watchmen Review Article by BrianEtrius, 01:57 AM 25th Mar Time for a different look at the acclaimed movie adaption of "Watchmen". WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD, IF YOU DON'T LIKE, DON'T READ. First off, I saw this in IMAX, which, like any good superhero movie, you have to see in. Now, Opening scene, great. Opening credits: Great way to introduce back story briefly. First scene: Beautiful, can't go wrong. It looks like it was taken straight out of the comic books. Awesome, 4 stars so far. Plus, it gives a little more back story to plot then the novel, (It was the Comedian who did in JFK, why though, is the question) Great so far. Okay, Dan didn't actually meet with Ozymandias, but that's fine. Added scene to perhaps have the audience not has Rorschach. Fine. No inclusion of Captain Metropolis? Great, he didn't add anything. Ozymandias leading the team meet up? Plausible. But then Ozymandias says: "Watchmen" NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Big nono. Can't have that happen. One of the most interesting points in the book was it never called that team Watchmen. EVER. It gave the book a mysterious feel. But in the movie? Blah. No good. Problem #1: Use of Watchmen in dialogue. Okay. You might be asking yourself, "Brian, it's only one little mistake. Why freak out?" Well, it snowballs. REALLY FAST. Okay, we move along, through the funeral, into the Doctor Manhattan interview. Now, I didn't have a problem with the interview, and I liked the fact that they brought Janey Slater into the room, sort of a Jerry Springer type thing. Great. But the fight scene between Dan and Laurie against the punks? Ugh. Terrible. Problem #2: Too much violence and sex. In that scene, we didn't need to see that guy's arm break and blood spurting out. And it gets out of control, REALLY FAST AGAIN. I had no problem with Jon being disintegrated. But when he blew up that guy in the underground? No. Gross. Could of skipped that part. Same with the Vietnam part. It could have been done better, without the violence. But no, for some reason, we need extraordinary amounts of blood. Okay, we get it. Laurie and Dan has sex. Now, I’m not a big fan of sex scenes in movies. I personally think that the audience 9 times out of 10 will get the idea, and you probably don’t need to show it. But 2 minutes? You got to be kidding me. And would someone put a Speedo on Doctor Manhattan? We don’t need to see the big blue penis in every scene. Like the prison riot scene. Did we really need to see that guy’s arms’ get chopped off? Lord no. It wasn’t even in the book. Peh, terrible taste. Which brings us to Problem #3: NOT FAITHFUL ENOUGH. Okay, the movie was what, 3 hours long? So you’re going to be thinking, “Of course they’re going to take out some parts, they can’t possibly have EVERYTHING.” Well, they could have at least had some parts and taken out others. For example, I was furious when they took out the entire conflict between Rorschach and his psychologist. The debate and chemistry between them were great and provided great allusions and metaphors to the superhero complex, what Watchmen is about. But no, the section was taken out. Adrian was hinted a lot more to be the bad guy in the movie, which took away a lot. Another strong point in the novel was you didn’t know until the end who did it. But then it was clear. In the movie, not as much. We knew for the most part, and even still the motives weren’t clear. I think that they could have taken out Holis Mason completely, and have his rise and fall be put on Under the Hood, because in the movie he did nothing, and they didn’t show his death. So take him out completely. Lastly, Jon’s the one to blame? What happened to the alien, and the boat on the island? Hello? It didn’t add anything, and it doesn’t make sense in context of the movie. What, the world is going to unite against a god? No, that’s just stupid. Problem #4: CASTING Silk Specter 1: Terrible. Too young, it just didn’t seem right that in real life she’s not that older than her supposed daughter. Adrian Veidt: Peh. Don’t get me started. Seriously, Zach Synder had a fluke with 300, because Watchmen stunk. I give it 1 and a half stars out of 4. Back to The Endless Crew